Back Off, Stress!

     What a week this has been and it is only Tuesday! 
     This morning my oldest son had surgery at the children's hospital to correct a problem that has been causing him a great amount of discomfort in the past few months.  Of my two children he is the strong, healthy one who gets an occasional cold or sinus infection but had perfect attendance for the entire school year this past year.  So, unlike his baby brother who has already had two surgeries by the age of five to insert ear tubes, he has very little experience in the art of being sick.
    In short, the word "surgery" scared him.  Alot.
     It even scared his little brother who spent the morning at day camp at his school crying and waiting for someone to pick him up.  He melted down immediatley upon seeing his brother- a clear indicator that even the youngest among us experience fear, worry and best of all, relief.
    It scares me too, but for different reasons.  There is a history of a disorder in my family called Malignant Hypothermia which is a severe and often fatal reaction to anesthesia.
    Everytime I, or one of my children are faced with "going under", I panic a little and worry a lot.  Fortunately the children's hospital has a protocol for such situations and they handle it with great ease and finesse'.  Needless to say the surgery was uneventful and very successful.  He will be up and running around in no time as though nothing ever happened and I will actually sleep tonight.
    Well, maybe.
    My husband has taken a bit of FMLA leave to go and be with his mother who has minimal time left on this planet.  Hours? Days?  A week or two?  No one can tell us for sure, and so we wait and see.
   With my sister's wedding only a few days away, we are not sure whether he will make it back or not.  Each hour of each day we wait for the phone call to come, the one forcing me to tell them boys that someone else they love has passed on.  I am so glad that they had the chance to see their grandmother in June and will always remember her as grammy who likes to cuddle and listens to every single one of their Nintendo DS stories.  I bet she even understands what Pokemon are!
    As a grown up, I understand that death is a part of life.  It's inevitable and I attempt to comfort myself by telling myself that she lived a rich life full of travel and exeriences and people who loved her.  But it isn't making things any easier.  Like I have said previously, she was always good to me and we have a great relationship as mother in law and daughter in law. 
     Stress seems to follow me around like the grey fluffy cat hair that seems to tumble across my wood floors like tumbleweeds in a desert.  I keep trying to get the drop on stress but it seems smarter than me, showing up around every corner.  Still, I am doing my best to dodge it and not succomb.  This week has been a true test of that little white blood pressure pill.
    Today's mantra:    
I won't give in.  I am stronger than the will of cancer, the inevitability of death and the strangulating force of stress. 
     Still, as I sit here, I am mentally taking stock of all the blessings in my life.  The wonderful show of support from friends and family as we prepared for this morning's adventure.  The offers of help if we needed it, the kind words, the offerred prayers...  How great is this village that I call my own?